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The couple above are my mother and my step-father, married on 31 January 1970, when I was fourteen. The picture was taken somewhat later; not sure when exactly. Their marriage began a much different life path for me…as some of you know better than others. We also remember 31 January for:
Congress passing Amendment XIII of the Constitution in 1865, abolishing slavery in the US.
The surrender of German troops at Stalingrad in 1943.
The first daytime soap opera on television, “These Are My Children"“ first aired on NBC TV in Chicago in 1949.
I mention these disconnected events because they have a certain resonance with my future after their wedding. While they were honeymooning in Florida, I finished 9th Grade under the watchful eye of my eldest sister. During that time, Mom’s mother passed, and we found out what Jack was really like.
Somewhat aloof when it suited him.
That fall, I went to an institution of “learning” for 10th Grade that was less about education than it was warehousing. For some of us, it felt a great deal like both slavery (there was “trading” of lower-classmen “servants” among the Seniors) and a long siege (the brutality and cruelty of some “students” beggared belief). That was before I got to Cranbrook Junior year. My home life with my step-father was very much like a soap opera, with accusations and fights and isolation and bad acting.
That is, when I wasn’t in school.
There were lighter moments, but not in my house. A lot of them had to do with my step-father’s family—his sons and grandchildren (my parent’s families were extinct, or out of contact). They treated me better than the old man did, I believe, because they knew what living with the old fossil was like. So did at least some of their kids—my new nieces and nephews, some of which were my age, or close to it. One niece, especially, was great fun. We kinda dated twice.
I had a hunger for history…
Towards the end of my high school career, I decided I wanted very much to get an advanced degree in history. Trouble was, if I stayed at home or asked most humbly for my step-father to pay for it (student loans were unheard of then, and I wasn’t smart enough for a scholarship), the answer would be…a life of “owing” him for my labor, just as I “owed” him for the privilege of going to those expensive private schools and living under his most generous roof…that my father bought. So I needed room and board while I studied. That meant the Army…twenty-seven years of it.
It wasn’t all bad.
My step-father, for all his faults, was a good businessman, and when he passed in 1994, he left my mother well enough off that she didn’t have to worry about money for the rest of her life. She passed in 2012, never hurting for money…which I cannot say about my father’s sudden and unexpected death that left three teenagers and a widow who had not worked in a quarter century not well off. That’s why the bare bones of the story in the Trilogy seem so…yeah…
Stella’s Game: A Story Of Friendships
I fictionalized all of this in Stella’s Game: A Story of Friendships. The character JJ Elrath is based on my early life and on a great deal of imagination and research.
Those of you who have read the first volume in the Trilogy and happen to like it can testify to the…ah…contents to those holdouts. As I said earlier, blame Barney for this post because he asked me some questions about it as he was reading it. I just happen to have been trying to come up with a theme for the 27 January newsletter and…so there. It’s Barney’s idea…
Coming Up
"Und Vin Ze Var…" And Other Myths
Armed Merchant Cruisers: The Spark
And Finally…
On 27 January:
1945: The Soviet 332nd Rifle Division enters the main Auschwitz camp in Poland. The reality of the camp complex staggered the liberators, including the few veterans of Stalingrad among them. Many wept at the sight of starving children, skeletons barely able to stand. At least a thousand inmates died that same day. This has been Holocaust Remembrance Day since 2005.
2006: Western Union sends its last telegram in the US. Founded in 1851, the company became Western Union Telegraph Company in 1856. The core business had sold the telegraphic business to another firm the day before.
And today is NATIONAL CHOCOLATE CAKE DAY. While I would absolutely love to enjoy a lovely piece of chocolate cake in celebration, chocolate now triggers migraines, so I’d better not. If one of my faithful readers would have some for me…?
Wow, John, that’s quite a story. I hadn’t realized you’d joined us in 11th grade, and the comment about 10th grade made me worry it was about Cranbrook. Thankfully not, although I remember Byron Baker was picked on during Lower School. Not our class’s finest hour. I’m sorry you had a rough time with your stepfather and lost your dad at an early age. Good for you to persevere and achieve your dream of becoming an author and historian. Best, Mike Elledge
Thanks, Mike. I wrote the Trilogy in part to exorcize those demons; it almost worked. You ought to read it, at least Stella's Game, which has a version of Cranbrook in it.